Awake my soul! No longer droop in sin.

What is sin? To commit sin is to willfully disobey God's commandments or to fail to act righteously despite a knowledge of the truth.

We are all sinners. I am a sinner. Lately I have been a slacker. I have not read my scriptures in months and I put in a half effort on the nights I choose to pray. I have sinned.

In December I had an experience that required my entire faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. My husband was sick, we were in a different country and all I wanted to come home to the U.S. in safety. I prayed with all the energy of my soul and had to trust that my faith in the Savior of the world was enough. I had a prayer going in my heart for the 48 hours that it took to get us back home. Then, the following scripture was manifested in my own life: " Thus we see how quick the children of men forget the Lord their God, yes, how quick to do iniquity, and to be led away by the evil one." Alma 46:8. As soon as we got home safely, I didn't even kneel to pray and thank my God for bringing us safely home.

I wasn't committing a terrible sin. I wasn't hurting anyone by not being grateful and by not praying. But I sure was not being grateful and that is enough to sadden my soul and I know that is enough to sadden my Father in Heaven. I feel like I have just been going through the motions for the last month. Praying and going to church just to go. No real intent behind either action. I have not felt the burning joy that I usually feel inside of me no matter how tough life gets. I miss that fire, I miss the Holy Ghost burning in my chest all day every day. He hasn't left me, He is still with me and guides me, but that is just not enough for me. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland said: "After an encounter with the Living Son of the Living God, nothing is ever again to be as it was before." That is why this is not enough for me anymore.

I chose to read my scriptures today. I chose to read a prayer offered by Nephi, a Book of Mormon prophet. How I wish I could speak to God with such beautiful language.

2 Nephi chapter 4 is the account of Nephi praying fervently to God. Nephi says: "My God hath been my support; he hath led me through mine afflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep. He hath filled me with his love, even unto the consuming of my flesh." Verse 20 & 21

This is how I feel about God, He has been my rock, He has been my source of strength, He has filled my life and my soul with His love.

Nephi goes on to say: "O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath visited men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions?" Verse 27

I feel like lately I have allowed my school and my job to get in the way, I have used them as an excuse to slacken my strength. I feel like I am allowing myself to forget how incredible God has been to me. I am allowing myself to forget that with God I can do all things, and without Him I can do NOTHING. I am allowing myself to forget about my very real and powerful encounters with my Savior Jesus Christ.

Then Nephi continues his prayer and exclaims something wonderful: "Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul." Verse 28

This struck me. This reminded me that I can have the burning love of God in my heart again, I can feel the happiness I have felt so many times before, I can have the burning fire of the spirit like an emblem in my heart every single day if I choose to stay close to my God and my Savior.

Christ's invitation is eternal: "Yea, verily I say unto you, if ye will come unto me ye shall have eternal life. Behold, mine arm of mercy is extended towards you, and whosoever will come, him will I receive; and blessed are those who come unto me." 3 Nephi 9:14

I am grateful for to Atonement of Jesus Christ, not only does it promise me Eternal Life, but it promises me happiness, peace and forgiveness in this life. I am grateful for His Atoning sacrifice, for it gives me purpose and it motivates me to be better. I am grateful for forgiveness, for it brings me closer to my God.

I stand with Nephi and exclaim as He did: "O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I will trust in thee forever. I will not put my trust in the arm of flesh; for I know that cursed is he that putteth his trust in the arm of flesh... I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen."

I testify that He lives. And I testify that we will never stand stronger than when we stand with God and Jesus Christ in our hearts.

I testify of this in the name of my loving Savior Jesus Christ. Amen.